Poppa's Got A Brand New Bag...

One reason I decided to not look for a job until after my sister's wedding was the hope that in this free time I would figure out my next step. I have figured out a few things:

1. I don't want to work in the profit sector.

I hate that in the name of "customer service" I am really performing "stockholder service". It comes down to this; customer service is basically applying lube before you give 'em a good ass-raping. I don't like making rich white men even richer so in turn they can sponsor a president who will do their bidding. It just makes me ill.

Therefore,

2. I would like to work in non-profit or start a non-profit.

I am rather unqualified for this endeavor but I have a hard-on as big as Texas to help those who are really in need. I always wanted to live this designer shoe, fast-track life, but I've come to realize that isn't what is going to satisfy me. I'm not really all that glamorous and I don't really want to be. I do love the thought of self-sacrifice to those who need help. I want to help preteen and teenage girls love and value themselves, build homes for needy families, help homeless single mothers learn skills so they can take care of their families, get women safely out of abusive households, to end poverty and violence against women, ...the list goes on.

3. I don't want to be in the Entertainment Industry.

As cool as it sounds, I just don't give a shit anymore. I was a theatre major and always felt rather indifferent to really having a career in that arena. Most of it just seems so foolish and silly. I love theatre and art and believe that they are as necessary as the air we breathe. But I don't think my heart is in it anymore.

That's as far as I've gotten so far. I just feel refreshed and renewed being out of the city. It's even raining out here. Lovely.