Friday, June 29, 2007

"I did it for Johnny!"

"This dates back to the early eighties!" Claims upweyguy, the individual who put this video on YouTube.

Really? That far back? All the way back to the early eighties? Wow. That's like old. Did they even have video back then? Or TV? It was just so long ago...

Yeah, it was 1984, you little shit, upweyguy. I remember watching it with my sister and laughing my ass off. Yeah, it was over twenty years ago, so what? It was fucking funny.

I'm way too drunk for this right now.

Julie Brown was my Fashion Guru

And I love "Earth Girls Are Easy".

Cause it's true. Especially when they're drunk. Like me. Right now.


How much is my dignity worth?

Not much.

(That's me and my friend Brian, in case you were wondering. His dignity is worth even less.)

Thursday, June 28, 2007

PG my ass...

Sex, sex, steal, dead, sexy, fuck, butt, sex, fuck, dead, steal, wrath, gluttony, envy, porn, sex, shit, asshole, ass, stupid, steal, affair, sex...

Don't mind me, I'm just hoping to get an NC-17 rating.

Sex, rob, hate, damn, sexy, butt, hate, stupid, fuck, sex, damn, lust, god damn, piss, loser, Dick Cheney...

ETA: Victory!!

Online Dating


My dad is melancholic.

This morning was the second time in one week that I came in to find my dad listening to folk music all weepy eyed. He'll stop me and make me listen to some sad pitiful song by Joan Beaz or the Kingston Trio. This morning he started crying. My father cries all the time so I'm used to it, but I'm starting to get worried.

My dad is prone to depression.

He was in outpatient psychiatric care for depression a year or so ago. Since then he's been a lot more open to talking about his feelings. We’ve had many long talks about the past and I’ve come to a better understanding of his behavior during my childhood. When anything bad would happen I would always go to my mother who never told my father. This led me to believe that my father needed to be protected from bad things. It turns out that he’s been suffering from depression on and off for years. Trust me, it explains a lot.

My dad is retired.

He takes walks and plans on getting a trailer so he and my mom can travel when she retires. He works on his MGTF he lovingly refers to as “The Duchess”. He’s around a lot.

My dad likes Pink.

Not the color. The singer. Pink. Yep, we haven’t been able to figure it out either.

He’s pretty cool, my dad. When he’s not being a grumpy old man, that is.

Monday, June 25, 2007


Hey all!

I had the funnest weekend with my 20 year old cousin Megan. We went out to dinner and saw Evan Almighty on Saturday and went for a bit of shopping down in Santa Monica. I, of course, spent way too much money. Here's what I got:


I do think it was worth it since I managed to score the last pair of Green Tweed Converse:

Tweed Converse

They are so beautiful I want to write odes to them.

"Converse is the name of my dream shoes,
Oh tweedy shoes of green and pink..."

I'll spare you the rest.

Hanging out with my cousin was so much fun, since she is full of the silly. My friends and I are all in our early thirties and we have real life grown up problems in regards to our relationship, careers and life in general. If these problems become overwhelming then the joy of life can be sucked right out of us. Life stops feeling free and light, if it ever was that way to begin with.

I miss it and forget that life can be fun. That's something I want to find again, the joy of being silly every once and a while. Like laughing so hard you pee a little or that wonderful feeling of not giving a wild horse shit what anyone else thinks. Silly should be the last thing we sacrifice when life gets difficult.

Hanging out with my cousin reminded me that I need to be less like this:

The Face Says Different

And more like this:

What a Wonderful Feeling...

Hey y'all, have some fun!

Thursday, June 21, 2007


A picture of me that I didn't take...

In other news...

I finally filled out my financial aid forms which completely freaked me out for some reason. I guess it's the not having control of my future bit that bothers me.

My puppy is growing and getting even more cuter every day. Like today, I started rubbing her belly and she bit my hand. I said no and she looked at me for a moment before giving in to the belly rub with a flop and a wag of the tounge. "Yes, I enjoy the belly rub, but I must play a little hard to get sometimes."

I find that I enjoy watching Star Trek: The Next Generation more than my old afternoon standard, Oprah. I haven't quite been able to put my finger on as to why this is so, but it might have something to do with a recent embracing of my inner geek. But I can say she's quite uncomfortable with the newfound social interaction as one might expect from one's inner geek.

I need to get a job as my IRS refund is slowly disappearing.

I'm not dating the Harry Connick, Jr. boy anymore, but we're still myspace friends.

I haven't eaten meat in about three months and I think it's going to stick. I don't feel deprived any more, even though still crave steak every once and while. I'm cooking much more which makes my family pretty happy, and I'm getting down to a healther weight. I find that having a moral reason for giving something up makes it easier. Now if I could find a moral reason to give up Salt and Vinegar potato chips...

Wednesday, June 20, 2007

I know I shouldn't like this...

...but I do! I give you Planet Unicorn, Heeeyyy!

I saw the first two episodes on Tell me why I like them? Is it the theme song? Or Tom Cruise the Unicorn? I just can't put my finger on it...

Friday, June 15, 2007


What I thought was something turned out to be nothing and I'm relieved. I never thought something like what didn't happen but thought had happened would be something that I would find relief in. At one time, this thing that didn't happen but I thought might've happen would've been the only thing I'd wish had happened. Now I'm just glad that thing I didn't want to happen didn't happen and that nothing has changed.

You know what I mean?

Wednesday, June 13, 2007

Hey, Guys. Wonder Joints.

I've come to a conclusion about my life. Once I was a popular girl who had lots of friends, but due to the politics of Jr. High I soon became a social outcast. Soon my friends were all social outcasts, but I was lucky because in the early nineties being angst ridden teen was quite trendy. In some ways I was cool again. All the popular girls who banished me were now wearing the thrift store style that I was mocked for a year before.

But the damage was done. I didn't want to be popular again. I wanted to be a freak. There was freedom in not caring about what the world around thought of me. I could create my own world in which Tori Amos, Tank Girl and The Rocky Horror Picture Show was the height of hip. And my friends and I had fun. A whole lotta fun.

I became popular again when I started going to church. I can't explain it but my friends and I were like Dawson's Creek, all the actions seemed to center around us. Then I left church and started entered the theater department of the college I attended. I just couldn't fit in with the kids there, mostly because after I left Christianity I was a deeply depressed angry intense person. I wasn't much fun to be around. Everyone was passionate about what they were doing and I was just drifting around indifferent to the world around me.

As I get older I start thinking about what kind of person I want to be. The conclusion I've come to is that I'm not cool. I've had moments where I was friends with the cool crowd, but I am NOT cool. Being cool means not being desperate or excited or silly or ever looking foolish. I will never be like those girls from Laguna Beach or hip like Hollywood starlets who seem to stroll about effortlessly through this world. Logic tells me that they must be human, yet it's so well hidden. My humanity is what makes me uncool, I guess.

That and the fact that I think robots are sexy:

Thursday, June 07, 2007

Dead by Dawn...

Now that my finals are done I can finally get some sleep. In the last few weeks I've been staying up studying, writing papers or just dicking around. Then I'd get up at 7 AM to go to class. When I don't get enough sleep I get silly and a little crazy, so much that I began to feel like this:

But I'm done. I feel great and down right happy. Having something positive to look forward to just makes life worth living, you know?

Friday, June 01, 2007

Idiot Boyfriend...

It's funny.

Over a week!?!

I haven't posted anything in over a week? Wow. It's not like I've suddenly gotten a life or anything.


I have a new puppy and she takes up a lot of my time. Gwennie is quite possibly the sweetest, smartest cutest puppy in the whole world. Yes, I mean the WHOLE ENTIRE WORLD! Right now she's sleeping at my feet with her little velvet belly sticking up just begging for a rubbing. I can't find my damn camera battery, so no pictures as of yet. I might break down and buy one tomorrow so the cuteness of my baby puppy can be shown to the world.

No really, she's pretty damn cute.


Most of my friends have some sort of personal or professional trauma that they're dealing with in one way or another. I wish I could fix the past or get them the perfect job or a perfect lover who would love unconditionally and never hurt them or at least just help them feel better.

Kathy, I love you and you're always in my thoughts.


I'd rather keep everything else to myself. Nothing personal, it's just that I'm learning to set boundaries. Keep a little mystery. I'm happy.